Sunday, January 25, 2009

"For Duty and Humanity!"

In what parallel universe would thinking about a Depression be more comforting than thinking about a recession?

The universe in which we now live now, I would propose. Six of one, half dozen of the other, as they say. The "recession" - also a term to which the pundits and their public were dragged kicking and screaming, struggling like puppies in a bag on its way to the river - just keeps bleeding away. It's recession, it's deepening recession, it's deep recession.



It's deep everybody-knows-what, is what it is. And no one is blaming the puppy.

Next up for admitting, now that the "recession" is about as deep as it can get (well, it could get deeper, until you're eating Chinese, if your self-denial is shoveling really hard ... ) is that it might - might - be wading, falling, lurching, stumbling, wandering, backing, sliding, tumbling, skidding, limping into Depression territory. The New Land. Not the bottom of the barrel, but the heavenly afterworld of recession. You are no longer sick, and struggling. You are in A Whole New Place, ready to prospect and stake a claim.

Doesn't that feel better than bleeding to death? Especially in a roomful of doctors? (How much anesthesia will you need to keep you knocked out for the next two years, while they pass the knives back and forth across your chest?)



For an excellent view of the semantics of "Depression" vs. "Recession," visit Jeffrey Hill's satisfyingly literate blog and watch the CNN video. Mr. Hill is an English teacher living in Le Havre, France.

FYI, the Three Stooges production still above is taken from "Men in Black," a 1934 short film in which the Stooges play med students on their first day of work at a hospital. (Their med school credentials: they have the highest temperatures in their class.) "For Duty and Humanity!" is the Stooges' repeated line in the short. "Men in Black" is the only Stooges film to be nominated for an Academy Award, as best Short Subject (Comedy). It was intended as a spoof on "Men in White," a Clark Gable and Myrna Loy film released the same year.

Thank you for listening, ma'am.

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